Up and Down

When you try your best, but you don't succeed

When you get what you want, but not what you need

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone, but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

Fix You- Coldplay

tiap saat pasti pernah ngerasa up, mungkin karena ada hal-hal baik terjadi, kamu lagi beruntung, atau ada great surprise, atau mungkin, punya moodbooster yang ampuh untuk ngehalau semua rasa ga karuan. tapi juga pasti pernah ngerasa down, cuma gara-gara hal yang kecil. misalnya lagi dalam keadaan yang seneng, up, tiba-tiba satu kalimat aja, bikin kita langsung down.

up then down, so many times I felt this way just because some words that, oh God, if you didn't say that, it won't be going on like this.

and I feeling so up and down quickly, like a rollercoaster on this last 2 months.

on the first week of January, everthing went like a hell, the true bad episode of a new movies, opened by a tears and crying all the day, happened in a few days. a thing, just a little thing ruined all of the plans which I'd planned from a month before. I'm in a down, trully a down

second week of January, I were starting to hiking to peak of happinnes, the up one. things going well, mostly, even some little thing distrubed. I hiked till the the end of January, a straight and wavy line. I stayed for a breath on a hut, one fourth remained to the peak, having no idea about go down.

first week of February. I thought I'd got slipped. I fell down, and luckily I found myself hanging on a tree on the half level of the mountain, thanks God. you want me to keep survive and step on the peak. and I did, if I fall down, I'd learned how to stand up again. things went soo, sometimes its so irritated or brought so many laughs. this time was harder than started to hiking, I made some steps forward, then I walked backwards by myself, just because a little thing which so irritating-I think-. or I could became so energetic just because a word. I think this time was not harder or harder anymore, this is the hardest in this 2 months. but I learned how to control myself, be an independent, and a free man. and successfully and luckily I could reached the two third level. but, however, it's hurt man!

second week of February, things were starting to go up. I'd separated threads from its noose, made it better.  altough I didn't reach the peak in this time, I could did everything happily since this week. easier to swing my feet to keep climbing!

third week, still swing my feet! and finally.. I stepped on the peak, on the up, though just for a day. but it was really.. Gosh! I felt so happy whereas the one of my happy-sad indicator did nothing. But, I flew to the peak. I'm up!

last week, let see what will happen ;)

you are the lucky and happy maker, not the receiver